some of you have expressed concern about my hubs recent *excavation* and i’m touched. so i wanted to give you a little update. everything’s fine. no cancer, although he does have a little bit of proctitis, which is basically itis of your proc, and i’m fairly sure most it was caused by the procedure itself.
anyway, the entire thing took about 30 minutes. when they wheeled him into recovery he was sleeping like a baby.
nurse: we just need to wake him up. (screaming) MR. X! TIME TO WAKE UP! (shakes his shoulders a bit)
me:uhhh. should you be doing that? he looks kind of out of it.
nurse: oh he’s fine! there’s just a few things i need to check before he can go – his blood pressure and one other…
hubs:(lying wordlessly on gurney) paaarrrp!
nurse:ok. he’s good to go.
hubs:(waking up) mungle pifgriff borogroves somforbe outgrabe margarita.
me: yep. seems normal to me.
***
in other news, it’s day 6 of no alcohol. making it through the weekend is going to be the hardest, but friday night is already in the can.
also, because i was complaining about the pre-procedure, stink-out funk that permeated our house this week, one of sister’s friends, robyn, was nice enough to tell me about poopouri. you spray it into the toilet and it’s supposed to trap the odor. there’s also a manly scent version and one for teenage girls.
the only catch is remembering to use it BEFORE you launch one into the toilet, which could be an issue if you’re in butt blowhole mode and time is of the essence.
Hey, I never said you could use my picture for your blog! 😉
I’m excited to hear that your hubs bunghole has remained intact post procedure.
I also need to check into that poopouri for my house. My kids tend to think that the only place they can crap is in MY bathroom. Even though they are small that doesn’t mean that their turds don’t smell like something crawled up inside them and died. I’ve gagged on several occasions.
candice – i have sooo found my halloween costume for this year. naughty nurse to the rescue!!!! yep, those little stinkers can really stank up the house. glad mine are all potty trained.
Great post! But, geez, photos of Sarah Palin keep popping up everywhere!
what a trooper your hubby is. Actually, YOU’RE the real hardcore trooper braving the week without margaritas or poopouri. 🙂
But does it come in Fluffy Puppy scent for those gas attacks in the dog’s crate?
Geez. I can see y’all now. Walking around the house with clothespins on your noses.
“butt blowhole.” Beautiful
Glad your man (or is he no longer considered a true man after that procedure) is doing well.
This is all waaaaaaaay too much information, but thanks for the pic on this post. It makes the procedure seem almost worth doing.
Hubs woke up channeling Lewis Carrol?
What kind of drugs did they give him anyway??
mojo – some really good ones.
My husband will be having a colonoscopy next week to remove polyps and his “clean it out” meds are lined up on the kitchen table. I can’t wait until it’s time for the grand finale: ENEMA TIME!! If I put my camera on delay, I should be able to get some very interesting pictures AND THEY WILL BE PUBLISHED.