agh! ok, ok, ok. i know it’s been weeks days, and i’ve been avoiding you guys like an old lover. but today heyjoe harassed me enough so that i’m feeling compelled to write. plus bex is pissed at me and candice freaking tagged me (which i’ll get to next), so i figured it’s time.
also, it taken about this long for me to realize some sad truths about myself.
the myth: i *really* like working.
the reality: i do not actually like working. i actually like shopping. shopping is my crack and i must work to feed the addiction. however, the hubs has taken away my credit cards, i’m in the throes of withdrawal, and i’m feeling quite bitchy. must.find.work.soon.
the myth: the reason i don’t cook is because i am always working.
the reality: i have no inner domestic goddess trying to escape. my whole family pretty much prefers anything stouffers to what i’ve been attempting.
teenage daughter: what *is* this stuff, mom? it tastes funny.
me: that’s because it’s homemade.
teenage daughter: oh… can i have some cereal?
the myth: women look better when they are happy.
the reality: i ran into an acquaintance at the grocery store today and had the following exchange.
her: hey! long time no see! you look great! what’s going on with you? wow, you look so skinny! have you lost weight?
me: oh, let’s see. i got shit canned. i’m depressed and going to therapy. i haven’t shaved my legs in two weeks and i’m living off coffee and dry honey nut cheerios. but apparently my ASS is noticeably smaller, so i’ve got that going for me.
god that felt good! i think i’m back.