how not to be a douche, paris style

there’s pretty much only a few rules to dining in paris. order what they recommend, and eat what they bring you. special orders are not appreciated and sending food back is a no-no.  i followed these rules and was rewarded with some of the most tasty and interesting food on the trip.

this was lunch at the eiffel tower.


i think they served me the travel gnome. he was delicious.

then they served his brother for dessert.


this was lunch near the basilique du sacre coeur (basilica of the sacred heart). i ordered from the pre fixe menu and had this for an appetizer:


and this was the main course. it’s called tartiflette au reblochon, which is really just a fancy name for french hash. it totally rocked.


but then my inner american got the better or me. our last night we went to a large brasserie. they had a huge menu (too many choices) and i got greedy and ordered what was advertised as a filet, cooked medium. apparently, something was lost in transation.


they speak english at

9 thoughts on “how not to be a douche, paris style

  1. Mark

    Ah, you want “bien-cuit” when you’re asking for your steak. (Unless the waiter or waitress has been giving you grief already, in which case, don’t order steak.)

    If you’re really up for an adventure, try “bleu”.


  2. leigh Post author

    mark – i’m pretty sure the insides of that steak qualified for “bleu.” dude…where were you when everyone was giving me advice BEFORE i went?!

    damon – spoken like a true parent. there is no bad french wine. much (too much) wine was drunk and it wass all good. i think i got dehydrated. which may also explain why i almost passed out at the company picnic on friday. yeah…i’m all class.

  3. Tracy

    The travel gnome comment cracked me up. I went to make sure that my gnome, Henry, was still safe in my garden. Don’t want him stolen for French cuisine.
    The dessert looked amazing! Was it?

  4. leigh Post author

    alice – the travel gnome hat was perched atop a small piece of (get ready) fish. the green stuff was risotto. as for the hat…i’m not really sure. i think it was some kind of breaded thing. i didn’t really eat it.

    tracy – this dessert may have been the best of the trip. it’s a poached pear, drizzled with caramel and sitting on some custard. plus there was something like heath bar chips in the bottom of the dish. and that little bread strip is a small apple tart. yummy! i ate mine…and my husbands.

  5. Bex

    GREAT post! You totally made me feel like I could have been there but got so drunk that I didn’t remember all of the details until I saw the pictures. And then I’d be like, “Ooohhhh, yeah…the gnome! NOW I remember…!”

    Glad you went, glad you’re back. Oh. And WTF is up with humor-blogs? Is that site ever gonna be right again? Nothing new is posting there. Hopefully it’s not the same bastards who brought down the Frog Bog. Who the hell has time to be a hacker anyway? I can’t even find five minutes to cut my toe nails. What kind of freak i’s gonna spend weeks at a time planning and plotting to bring comedy bloggers down to their knees?! Douche bags….

  6. leigh Post author

    bex – there was a lot of wine being drunk. when i went back and looked at the pics, i had the same reaction. oh yeah…. i forgot about that. thank god for the camera.

    i’m afraid h-b is broken. i’m sad.


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