recently, i told you guys a story about my sister, dr. laura, catapulting a VW rabbit off a small cliff and lodging it mid-air between some oak trees.
after the post my mom sent me an email, in which she gave me the lowdown on the whole incident, including the curious lack of explosive retribution from my dad, and thoughtfully included the details of some of our other vehicular exploits.
i thought you might enjoy reading them, especially if you thought i was exaggerating, because i so was not. my commentary is in blue.
…
Leigh, you thought nothing happened, but it was behind the scenes.
The VW was a brand new car. Laura had earned her driver’s license exactly ONE WEEK before, and she asked Dad if she could take the car and drive a bunch of her friends out to a friend’s ranch for the afternoon. He said yes. When I found out, I was mad and told him she didn’t have enough experience to be allowed to take a BRAND NEW CAR out with a bunch of friends!
We had a row about it. He huffed and puffed and got mad at ME for disagreeing with him. So when Laura wrecked the car, he couldn’t say anything, because I TOLD HIM NOT TO LET HER TAKE THE CAR. And I was too smart to say I TOLD YOU SO. It wasn’t really necessary, anyway. And I didn’t say anything, because “I told you so” would have just set off another disagreeable row. He knew I was right, anyway.
ahhh! the power of “i told you so.” it all makes perfect sense now.
There are other car adventures. What about the Mav?
the “Mav” was a 1974, solid steel, ford maverick. a virtually indestructible, hand-me-down of an american tank from our dad, tricked out in lovely 1970s champagne gold body paint, a brown vinyl roof, reclining bucket seats (hubba), and a V8 engine that allowed it to haul ass (which we did).
dad loved that car, but at the time i don’t think we truly appreciated it for its muscle car stylings. we thought it was fugly. hey, most of our friends were driving europeon imports. we drove that poor car into the ground, and i think it was finally donated to goodwill for a tax deduction.
in retrospect, i must admit it was a genius move on dad’s part, although i’m not sure it was intentional. i plan to buy my kids a cheap heap and only carry liability. check out the vintage 70s commercial. maverick, maverick, maverick, maverick!!!!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2D2F2fjaHE&feature=related (try the link if the video looks weird)
apparently mavericks were HUGE in mexico.
Dad had the fender repaired the first time you dented a fender. By the time the last girl was driving, he’d just take a hammer out to the driveway and pound on the fender until it wasn’t rubbing the tire. Sessie said the Mav was kind of famous at Austin High by the time the third girl drove it.
And the time someone tried to get the car out of the driveway with another car parked behind it. I can’t remember who it was anymore, the incidents just all blend together.
ok, this one goes to sessie. quoth she, “the mav once got into a fight with the front of our house and won.” she said she thought it would be the opposite of trying to parallel park.
The car hit the edge of the house and knocked a chunk of stones out. Much cursing and a wheelbarrow full of cement later, you can still make out the patch after 20 years.
yep. they just don’t make cars like that anymore.
And the time someone backed out and turned too sharply.
oops. guilty as charged. i’m also the only one to take out 2 family cars in one incident.
The left front fender hit the right rear fender of Dad’s car parked in the driveway. Two cars at once. Dad was apoplectic. He pulled his billfold out of his pocket and slammed it down on the driveway. I guess that’s symbolic.
i’m sure this was just the first of many wallet-slamming episodes. we hadn’t even gone to college yet.
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mom, thanks so much for sharing. i haven’t laughed this hard in a long time. i wonder if dad will find this quite as amusing.
p.s. mom, if you going to comment my blog, you need to go ahead and sign up for HB so you can vote for me. you too, sessie.
Leigh Online 
I love your Mom’s writing. Clearly, funny runs in the family. – – Hi Leigh’s Mom!
nanny goats – yep. she’s a riot. i told her i was running this. still waiting for her comments.
Man, when your dad spikes his wallet you know you’ve pushed ALL the buttons.
God, I’m so not looking forward to th upcoming teen years. Thanks for the stomach cramps Leigh.
Not only did you take out 2 cars backing up “in the day”, your inabilility to back out of the driveway continues into the new millenium…i.e. 2 (imports) and 1 (domestic). Plus 1 (import) at the company garage. You might be angry because people drive like shit…but you park like shit.
signed your loving hubs
Don’t feel bad Leigh, my hubs still manages to back into our house and my car and he’s THRITY-ONE! ;op
Ok, I am laughing that “hubs” commented. Leigh, remember when I came to stay at your house a few years ago and you pulled out of the driveway to go to work and hit my car? Another two-fer.
BTW, last year I backed out of my garage and took off the side mirror on my brand new car. House 1, car 0. They just don’t make ’em like the Mav any more. *sigh*
What is it with you girls? I have been driving since..well, I’m not saying. And I have never even scratched a car. Last time Laura came to visit, she had a long scrape on the side of her car. I asked her husband what happened, and he said “I don’t even ask anymore.”
joeybear – i’m like an airplane. the only times you need to worry are when i’m taking off and landing.
sessie and mom – ok. you left comments. now go vote.
Leigh’s Dad
Remember the incident between Dumas and Dalhart?? Another “total” event.
ed.
Well hello Leighs mom and dad! It’s me, Damon. Sorry to hear about just how bad your kids are at driving. But go easy on ’em. With the poor condition of the real eatate market, there will soon be plenty of houses jumping in front of cars. See you at Christmas!
Dear Leigh’s Mom… what the hell does “We had a row about it” mean?
Excuse me, but, don’t talk to my mom like that. Try http://www.dictionary.com.
Hi Jeff. A row (rhymes with how) is a noisy disagreement.
Hi Damon. We look forward to seeing you at Christmas–bring the kids. There’s lots of food!
Mom: Thanks. I’d never heard that before. LOL!
Sessie: There was an implied “wink” that probably didn’t come thru. I would never talk to your mom or anyone’s mom that way for reals.
OMG! I drove a ’69 Dodge Dart that my grandfather sold me for $400 in 1986. My car was one year older than me. Dad boosted it on lifts in the back. Olive green with turn signal lights on the OUTSIDE, at the front of the hood. It was bitchin. Hydroplaned into a guardrail in the pouring rail after buying the Wilson’s Leather suede bolero jacket with the fringe on the sleeves that I HAD to have before the St. Mary’s youth group meeting the next day because I was in love with Patrick and Jimmy… *sigh* Smashed it at 50 mph and barely dented the fender. Those cars were TANKS!
1986: plaid skirt and forest green blazer, 16 years old, 3 carpool neighbors, The Beastie Boys & Guns and Roses blasting on the radio, smokin’ Marlboro Reds, on the way to our Catholic high school…. damn, those memories will never get old! Thanks for your memories, Leigh!